Buster Keaton

“We used to get arrested every other week — that is, the old man would get arrested.”

“The funny thing about our act is that dad gets the worst of it, although I'm the one who apparently receives the bruises … the secret is in landing limp and breaking the fall with a foot or a hand. It's a knack. I started so young that landing right is second nature with me. Several times I'd have been killed if I hadn't been able to land like a cat. Imitators of our act don't last long, because they can't stand the treatment.”

“A picture without falls is as bad as Niagara in the same fix”

“Marriage is fine as an institution, but bad as a habit”

“Our hero came from Nowhere — he wasn't going Anywhere and he got kicked off Somewhere.”

“If one more person tells me this is just like old times, I swear I'll jump out the window.”

“Charlie Chaplin and I would have a friendly contest: Who could do the feature film with the least subtitles?”