Spoonerisms

“Let us drink to the queer old Dean.”

“You have deliberately tasted two worms and you can leave Oxford by the town drain.”

“[Alternatively] Sir, you have tasted two whole worms; you have hissed all my mystery lectures and been caught fighting a liar in the quad; you will leave Oxford by the next town drain.”

“The Lord is a shoving leopard.”

“Runny be quimble, Runny be nick, Runny cump over the jandlestick.”

“Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.”

“Leaves no tone unsterned.”

“I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.”

“Names can be spoonerisms also, like Willie Nelson (Nellie Wilson) and Bobby Hall (hobby ball).”